Episodes

Tracy interviews Gretchen Baskerville author of the book and blog "Life-Saving Divorce." Gretchen has been a visible critic of the "Reconciliation Industrial Complex" and Christian evangelical marriage retreats in particular....

A recent news article discussed the increase in popularity of polyamory as an option on dating sites, while contrasting it with real life TV shows featuring polyamorous relationships, like Sister Wives, where the arrangement ...

Tracy talks with pyschologist Dr. Peter Salerno about the intersection of infidelity and personality disorders. A lot of conventional therapy assumes that clients lack insight into their behavior and that antisocial behavior ...

Chump Nation came up in an NPR discussion about how to define cheating. Unfortunately, the commentators seemed to have no lived experience or deep sunk costs with a cheater. The conversation centered on rejections like your b...

What happens when you discover your teen or adult child has been cheated on? Do your kids navigate this better if you modeled good boundaries? Or is the chump condition heriditary? In this episode, Sarah discusses how her dau...

Sarah and Tracy hear from listeners about how their cheaters' affairs were exposed. (None of them by Jumbotron, alas.) Some affair partners outed the relationships to win the pick-me dance. In other cases, technology mishaps ...

Guest cohost Jenny aka The Happy Hausfrau blogger and Tracy discuss the Bezo wedding extravangaza and what happens when affair partners marry. We hear from listeners about Schmoopie nupitals and what marriage means to the mon...

It's the biggest cheating scandal of the year -- former Astronomer CEO Andy Byron and his subordinate HR Chief Kristin Cabot caught mid-canoodle by a Jumbotron "kiss cam." The world is reveling in schadenfreude, but what does...

Guest co-host Jenny aka the Happy Hausfrau blogger and Tracy snark about the guy who proposed marriage to his ChatGPT girlfriend, but not his live-in girlfriend and mother of his child. Are ChatGPT paramours the new frontier ...

You never know what kind of reaction you'll get when you confront a cheater. On the one hand are the stone cold freaks with no adaptive anxiety. They lean into their lies and never break a sweat. Even in the face of hard evid...

Besides the cheating, what else didn't you know about? Listeners tell us the details of their cheaters double lives beyond the sex. The missing monies. The hooker habit. An entire other family. Where there's one secret, you m...

In this episode Tracy gives her take on the news that Dave Grohl and his wife Jordyn Blum have decided to reconcile. While Grohl simultaneously has committed himself to being a "hands on" father with his daughter by his affai...

Tracy and Sarah respond to a listener's dilemma about her husband. He's cheating with men, but swears he's not gay. She's trying to get him into sex addiction therapy. Also, a Fuckwit of the Week submission -- exotic vacation...

In this episode, we react to an atrocious column in the New York Times by therapist Lori Gottlieb, where a woman asks if she should be honest with her children about their father's cheating and the resulting divorce. Gottlieb...

Did you thwart a cheater's happiness? Are you the obstacle to their greatness? In this episode Tracy and Sarah explore stupid cheater life plans. The grass is always greener on the other side of whatever they committed to. In...

If you just discovered your partner cheating, chances are you got some common reconciliaton advice like "Wait 6 months before you make a decision." Or "Don't tell anyone." Or moronic warnings about "affair fog." (They know no...

In this re-edited interview, we talk with trauma specialist Diane Strickland and creator of the site yourstoryissafehere.com about sex addiction and partners being labeled "codependent." Why women are shamed for their anger. ...

In this re-edited version of an earlier recording, Sarah and Tracy spoke with Dr. Omar Minwalla, a therapist who is known for his work "The Secret Sexual Basement." He sees infidelity as abusive and a sexual deception problem...

In this re-edited version of an early broadcast, Tracy and Sarah challenge therapist Andrew G. Marshall on his promise that marriages can be affair-proofed. Did he say that? Was he taken out of context when he told women that...

In this episode we hear about all the imponderable things cheaters wanted in the breakup. Not real estate, or children, or sentimental items. But weird stuff, like flooring tiles they'll never use. Or that book on West Virgin...

In this short episode, Tracy and Sarah respond to a letter from a woman who's husband was astounded that after decades of marriage she left him. He was a church deacon, a Jesus cheater, with a double life. As she left, he tol...

Keeping on the theme of good people, we asked listeners who helped them get through infidelity? Who was their guiding angel? A stranger, family member, friend? Cheaters might destroy your trust in humanity, but others renew y...

We asked listeners -- what random act of kindness moved you after you were chumped? Tracy tells about her mysterious breakfast benefactor and Sarah shares a story about the time her car broke down. We hear about infidelity an...

Tracy and Sarah answer your letters including one from a woman who discovered her husband was telling people online that she was dead and referred to another woman and their child as "wife and daughter." Is this a game to him...